So that time came when I had to take off my wedding ring and engagement ring off for good. My fingers are swollen enough that it hurts and they don't come on and off easily. I actually have a bruise on my ring finger from taking the band off- I would guess i am not a size 4 any more. I don't even want to know what size pants I am since even maternity pants won't go through my hips...
they do actually but it takes some time and a lot of squeezing in. They fit fine around my belly but the hips have always been a problem.
E
Monday, October 29, 2007
I just was reading an article on how to recognize the signs of true labor and this tought came to my mind. If my water breaks at home my husband will kill me because it will most likely ruin the floors that were not finished properly. I thought it was pretty funny.
somehow my fear of labor has totally disappeared and i am totally looking forward to it. It's amazing how our bodies and minds work and how easy it could be to get rid of fear as long as you have an open mind.
As i suspected I got a big No to my idea to have a homebirth for the second child. Jeff says that I need to be in a hospital in case something goes wrong. He doesn't know that giving birth in a hospital scares me more than labor and delivery itself. There are obviously so many more things thatcan go wrong in a hospital with a doctor that is only taught how to intervene with the natural process of birth.
It's ok I have enough time to convince him and if I can't too bad because i am the one giving birth and I will do whenever the hell i please. When he pushes out a 7 lb baby out of his baby and is planning to breastfeed it for a year he can have a say in the location of birth.
E
somehow my fear of labor has totally disappeared and i am totally looking forward to it. It's amazing how our bodies and minds work and how easy it could be to get rid of fear as long as you have an open mind.
As i suspected I got a big No to my idea to have a homebirth for the second child. Jeff says that I need to be in a hospital in case something goes wrong. He doesn't know that giving birth in a hospital scares me more than labor and delivery itself. There are obviously so many more things thatcan go wrong in a hospital with a doctor that is only taught how to intervene with the natural process of birth.
It's ok I have enough time to convince him and if I can't too bad because i am the one giving birth and I will do whenever the hell i please. When he pushes out a 7 lb baby out of his baby and is planning to breastfeed it for a year he can have a say in the location of birth.
E
Friday, October 26, 2007
Natural?
So I have been reading Ina May's guide to childbirth and wish that I had known all this information earlier because I would have opted out for a completely natural childbirth. I think it's a bit too late to switch doctors now, and I think that they will be pretty accomodating as to how much intervention I want. There are certain things that the hospital requires, like giving the baby vitamin K and baby monitoring, and there's nothing I can do but I have made up my mind that I don't want any drugs.
Furthermore i have decided that I will wait as long as possible before going to the hospital so that I can eat and drink and relax as much as possible before I get into the doctor's hands.
REading the book about natural childbirth didn't neccesarily introduce any new odeas to me. I was already convinced that this is the most natural process and that my body will kow what to do. What the book did is that explain in simple words and great detail, what happens and why and why are some hospital practices dangerous. On the other side- if something happens that I need intervention and can't prevent it I look at it this way. so many kids are born in hospitals with epidurals and IVs and they are completely healthy that it can't be that bad. Of course I want the best for my baby so I would do anything in my power to give her the best I can. And the only thing that is completely in my power is being drugged- so I won't be- unless I require a c-section. An intersting thing i learned from the book is that the chance of a c-sections increases with the epidural. So if there was any doubt in my mind about having an epidural it's gone. Also the epidural makes it problematic to breastfeed so definitely no happy drugs for me.
I am sure my husband will laugh at me when i tell him all this but who cares. He thinks that being involved in pregnancy and childbirth begins around the due date and is right now preoccupied with building closets. I think that one day he will look back and wish he was more involved but it would be too late. hopefully he'll figure it out before the second one. And he better because I think with the second one I am hiring a midwife and having it at home. I do feel more comfy in the hospital in case anything goes wrong, but if I could it all over again I don't think I want doctors involved.
I finally found a birthing class we can attend and it wa pretty cheap- "only" $ 250. It is with a nurse from the hospital but I think it's important to know what exactly is their plan so that i can avoid what I want to avoid.
Meanwhile Maddi is getting bigger and I think she'll be one funny kid. she likes molding my belly in strange shapes and I gotta say she doesn't really kick me, she moves and swirls and pokes here and there but it's just funny. Sometime she just reajusts her position and I can feel her head or foot or elbow (not that i know which one it is) under my skin. It's really cute and she really likes it when i rubmy tummy ( or may be that's just me).
E
Furthermore i have decided that I will wait as long as possible before going to the hospital so that I can eat and drink and relax as much as possible before I get into the doctor's hands.
REading the book about natural childbirth didn't neccesarily introduce any new odeas to me. I was already convinced that this is the most natural process and that my body will kow what to do. What the book did is that explain in simple words and great detail, what happens and why and why are some hospital practices dangerous. On the other side- if something happens that I need intervention and can't prevent it I look at it this way. so many kids are born in hospitals with epidurals and IVs and they are completely healthy that it can't be that bad. Of course I want the best for my baby so I would do anything in my power to give her the best I can. And the only thing that is completely in my power is being drugged- so I won't be- unless I require a c-section. An intersting thing i learned from the book is that the chance of a c-sections increases with the epidural. So if there was any doubt in my mind about having an epidural it's gone. Also the epidural makes it problematic to breastfeed so definitely no happy drugs for me.
I am sure my husband will laugh at me when i tell him all this but who cares. He thinks that being involved in pregnancy and childbirth begins around the due date and is right now preoccupied with building closets. I think that one day he will look back and wish he was more involved but it would be too late. hopefully he'll figure it out before the second one. And he better because I think with the second one I am hiring a midwife and having it at home. I do feel more comfy in the hospital in case anything goes wrong, but if I could it all over again I don't think I want doctors involved.
I finally found a birthing class we can attend and it wa pretty cheap- "only" $ 250. It is with a nurse from the hospital but I think it's important to know what exactly is their plan so that i can avoid what I want to avoid.
Meanwhile Maddi is getting bigger and I think she'll be one funny kid. she likes molding my belly in strange shapes and I gotta say she doesn't really kick me, she moves and swirls and pokes here and there but it's just funny. Sometime she just reajusts her position and I can feel her head or foot or elbow (not that i know which one it is) under my skin. It's really cute and she really likes it when i rubmy tummy ( or may be that's just me).
E
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Aches and pains???
I read all the weekly pregnancy calendars and I feel bad because I don't have any of the aches and pains and other nuisances that they are describing.
Mood swings?- i have never felt better and happier in my life. I do go in bad mood but that's either because I have to deal with my professors who are idiots or because the managing company of the nw building is incompetent and the neighbors obviously have nothing else to do but complain.
Trouble sleeping?- yeah, when my husband decides to build closets and unpack boxes at 12:00 am. I sleep great - I haven't even needed the pillow between my legs these days.
Backaache? - none. Even the terrible pains I had to go to physical therapy for are gone. I expected to be hunched after packing and unpacking Jeff's life collected in the past 39 years. but no- no pain what so ever.
Let's see what else- fatigue?- none- I have so much energy, I would go rollerblading if I was allowed.
Constipation and heartburn?- none just very powerful burp, that i am enjoying trmemedously since burped very rarely before I got pregnancy.
On top of all that my scale is telling me that I have lost 2-3 pounds, which I guess is not that great, yet considering that I have gained plenty of weight- about 35 lb so far does not worry me. And I have been eating normally, and healthy most of the time, except for the remains of my babyshower cake, which is really good.
I have no problem laying on my back and I like it because I can see my belly moving and jiggling like jelly every time she moves.
My blood pressure is great according to my doctor- 100 over 60 and I have almost no swelling what so ever. YEs my feet are a bit puffy, but they are caring about 160 lbs so I can't blame them.
I am scared to say but I don't really feel pregnant. I wake up and I feel like i should fit into my old clothes- i feel skinny and fit. Well, it is a little depressing when the shorts I wore pre-pregnancy won't even go through my hips but something has to bring me back to preganant reality. Every time i look at my belly I am surprised and I laugh.
so far my biggest complaint is that it's a bit too hot for fall and I am not a big fan of the heat these days. I wouldn't mind it being 5 -10 degrees cooler but everyone else seems to be enjoying it.
So I hope that everything continues this way. Right now I am convinced that I will have a very easy and speedy delivery, but I don't want to jinx it. Hope everything is ashappy inside as it is outside my buldging belly. A little afraid that everything is going too good and something may turn out wrong at the end. But I can't let thougths like that bother me.
Everything will be just great.
E
Mood swings?- i have never felt better and happier in my life. I do go in bad mood but that's either because I have to deal with my professors who are idiots or because the managing company of the nw building is incompetent and the neighbors obviously have nothing else to do but complain.
Trouble sleeping?- yeah, when my husband decides to build closets and unpack boxes at 12:00 am. I sleep great - I haven't even needed the pillow between my legs these days.
Backaache? - none. Even the terrible pains I had to go to physical therapy for are gone. I expected to be hunched after packing and unpacking Jeff's life collected in the past 39 years. but no- no pain what so ever.
Let's see what else- fatigue?- none- I have so much energy, I would go rollerblading if I was allowed.
Constipation and heartburn?- none just very powerful burp, that i am enjoying trmemedously since burped very rarely before I got pregnancy.
On top of all that my scale is telling me that I have lost 2-3 pounds, which I guess is not that great, yet considering that I have gained plenty of weight- about 35 lb so far does not worry me. And I have been eating normally, and healthy most of the time, except for the remains of my babyshower cake, which is really good.
I have no problem laying on my back and I like it because I can see my belly moving and jiggling like jelly every time she moves.
My blood pressure is great according to my doctor- 100 over 60 and I have almost no swelling what so ever. YEs my feet are a bit puffy, but they are caring about 160 lbs so I can't blame them.
I am scared to say but I don't really feel pregnant. I wake up and I feel like i should fit into my old clothes- i feel skinny and fit. Well, it is a little depressing when the shorts I wore pre-pregnancy won't even go through my hips but something has to bring me back to preganant reality. Every time i look at my belly I am surprised and I laugh.
so far my biggest complaint is that it's a bit too hot for fall and I am not a big fan of the heat these days. I wouldn't mind it being 5 -10 degrees cooler but everyone else seems to be enjoying it.
So I hope that everything continues this way. Right now I am convinced that I will have a very easy and speedy delivery, but I don't want to jinx it. Hope everything is ashappy inside as it is outside my buldging belly. A little afraid that everything is going too good and something may turn out wrong at the end. But I can't let thougths like that bother me.
Everything will be just great.
E
Sunday, October 21, 2007
I LOVE PRESENTS
Yes, I made a little boo-boo, and posted a posted with nothing on it.
Who cares?
Anyway I just had a lovely baby shower and I am convinced that one of my favorite activities is getting presents.
It certainly is nice to have so many people thinking of you( and offering baby-sitting services) and I feel so loved and so happy that my baby will have such great friends around her.
I felt like everyone left too soon and I didn't get to say hello to everybody ( becasue I was opening presents most of the time)- I hope everyone had fun as much as I did.
Now I have to go through all the stuff I got because I already don't remember what I got.
Oh and thank you notes- I think I just finished writing thank you notes for my wedding gifts and now I have to start all over again. But everything is greatly appreciated.
Well certainly is great to have my husband back after a week's absence- of course daily life becomes crazy when he is around but that's why I love him.
E
Who cares?
Anyway I just had a lovely baby shower and I am convinced that one of my favorite activities is getting presents.
It certainly is nice to have so many people thinking of you( and offering baby-sitting services) and I feel so loved and so happy that my baby will have such great friends around her.
I felt like everyone left too soon and I didn't get to say hello to everybody ( becasue I was opening presents most of the time)- I hope everyone had fun as much as I did.
Now I have to go through all the stuff I got because I already don't remember what I got.
Oh and thank you notes- I think I just finished writing thank you notes for my wedding gifts and now I have to start all over again. But everything is greatly appreciated.
Well certainly is great to have my husband back after a week's absence- of course daily life becomes crazy when he is around but that's why I love him.
E
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
not much time
Yes, unfortunately i haven't had much time to write. Even these few minutes are stolen from precious time for unpacking.
Jeff left for SF and I am trying to unpack the whole apartment by myself by Sunday. I suspect that my baby shower will be in the midst of many boxes and unhooked electronics.
It's been a hell of a week- one week to pack the old apartment, then the carzy 13 hours move, where most of our furniture was broken anyway. My body finally crashed last night- I went ot bed at 8:30 and didn't get up until 8:00 this morning.
Now i have to juggle unpacking and two midterms next week- I feel like I am running a marathon and don't have time to stop and take a breath.
Maddie's been quiet- probably because i am tired, can't wait to see the doctor on friday so he can tell me everything is allright.
The new apartment is very nice - I like the color rooms- even though Jeff is not crazy about the green...
Gotta go now.
E
Jeff left for SF and I am trying to unpack the whole apartment by myself by Sunday. I suspect that my baby shower will be in the midst of many boxes and unhooked electronics.
It's been a hell of a week- one week to pack the old apartment, then the carzy 13 hours move, where most of our furniture was broken anyway. My body finally crashed last night- I went ot bed at 8:30 and didn't get up until 8:00 this morning.
Now i have to juggle unpacking and two midterms next week- I feel like I am running a marathon and don't have time to stop and take a breath.
Maddie's been quiet- probably because i am tired, can't wait to see the doctor on friday so he can tell me everything is allright.
The new apartment is very nice - I like the color rooms- even though Jeff is not crazy about the green...
Gotta go now.
E
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
little things
Lat week I had this dream where I could see Maddie's outline on my belly and she was streching her arms as if just waking up and I made sure that I counted 10 fingers and 10 toes and she was so beautiful. I could see her so clearly, but instead of being creepy it was amazing, when I woke up I felt so serene and happy it is hard to describe.
Last night when Jeff had his head on my belly I had that same feeling. He put his ear on my buldging belly and started talking to her and she started kicking and moving and he could feel it and it was just so beautiful. I don't think I ever felt so happy.
In the meantime getting bigger is not helping me pack. The apartment is all in boxes andI feel totally helpless because I can't do much. My back starts hurting after I pack for about an hour and I can't bend or pick up heavy stuff. My feet swell and hurt and I feel really bad that Jeff has to do most of the work by himself.
But I am very excited that we are moving.
that being said I don't have much time because I need to get my little share of packing while I still have energy.
E
Last night when Jeff had his head on my belly I had that same feeling. He put his ear on my buldging belly and started talking to her and she started kicking and moving and he could feel it and it was just so beautiful. I don't think I ever felt so happy.
In the meantime getting bigger is not helping me pack. The apartment is all in boxes andI feel totally helpless because I can't do much. My back starts hurting after I pack for about an hour and I can't bend or pick up heavy stuff. My feet swell and hurt and I feel really bad that Jeff has to do most of the work by himself.
But I am very excited that we are moving.
that being said I don't have much time because I need to get my little share of packing while I still have energy.
E
Thursday, October 4, 2007
91 days to go
Or so says my pregnancy calendar says. Looking at it seems like this child will be born very soon I know though that there are countless more hours of backpain, aches, indigestion, huffing and puffing and not sleeping on my stomach.
'After the scare Maddie gave me last week, she is now perfrming double and triple somersaults in between other circus acts in my tummy. I am happy to feel her moving, but at the same time it feels weird. sometimes it makes me laugh- as if someone is tickling me from the inside.
You would think it's weird to feel someone else moving inside you- I mean think about any random person and imagine them in you belly- hipping and hopping left and right, poking you and kicking you. It's not a pleasant thought. Actually it makes me think of the Gaould from Stargate on Sci Fi- it's a bit kreepy. Yet it's your child so you think it normal. Anyway that is what I was thinking when I couldn't sleep this morning. I like getting up early before anyone else is up. I really wouldn't mind it at all if I could have a proper cup of steaming coffee, instead of the coffee flavored milk I sip now and then.
Thinking of this I suspect my daughter will be very fond of cows. I didn't enjoy drinking milk and eating burgers and lasagna until she decided to take residence in my belly. My husband think that mayo is disgusting, but he doesnt realize that ketchup mayo and french fries are the only thing that make a burger edible to me. By the way I didn't eat ketchup or mayo before I got knocked up.
Let's see what else is new. I have a nice zig-zaggy, lopsided lines negra under my bellybutton. If what I have right now can even be called a belly button.
Can't seem to find a birthing class, unless I want to give them $400 for a date I can't even make. So I think I would end up just wing it on my own.Then I can probably start teaching my own class- what to do when you don't know what to do and make $100 an hour for that.-Its quite ridiculous if you think about it. they are trying to cash in on the fact that you are scared and would do anything that makes you somewhat confident that you know what to do. Truth is when the moment comes- you are on your own and trying to remeber which way to breathe in and out won't make the baby come out any faster than it wants to come out.
anyway, that's my outlook on it, so I think that I will buy some books and look up MR. Bradley online and pray that Madison will come out as easy as she got in.
E
'After the scare Maddie gave me last week, she is now perfrming double and triple somersaults in between other circus acts in my tummy. I am happy to feel her moving, but at the same time it feels weird. sometimes it makes me laugh- as if someone is tickling me from the inside.
You would think it's weird to feel someone else moving inside you- I mean think about any random person and imagine them in you belly- hipping and hopping left and right, poking you and kicking you. It's not a pleasant thought. Actually it makes me think of the Gaould from Stargate on Sci Fi- it's a bit kreepy. Yet it's your child so you think it normal. Anyway that is what I was thinking when I couldn't sleep this morning. I like getting up early before anyone else is up. I really wouldn't mind it at all if I could have a proper cup of steaming coffee, instead of the coffee flavored milk I sip now and then.
Thinking of this I suspect my daughter will be very fond of cows. I didn't enjoy drinking milk and eating burgers and lasagna until she decided to take residence in my belly. My husband think that mayo is disgusting, but he doesnt realize that ketchup mayo and french fries are the only thing that make a burger edible to me. By the way I didn't eat ketchup or mayo before I got knocked up.
Let's see what else is new. I have a nice zig-zaggy, lopsided lines negra under my bellybutton. If what I have right now can even be called a belly button.
Can't seem to find a birthing class, unless I want to give them $400 for a date I can't even make. So I think I would end up just wing it on my own.Then I can probably start teaching my own class- what to do when you don't know what to do and make $100 an hour for that.-Its quite ridiculous if you think about it. they are trying to cash in on the fact that you are scared and would do anything that makes you somewhat confident that you know what to do. Truth is when the moment comes- you are on your own and trying to remeber which way to breathe in and out won't make the baby come out any faster than it wants to come out.
anyway, that's my outlook on it, so I think that I will buy some books and look up MR. Bradley online and pray that Madison will come out as easy as she got in.
E
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