After almost 9 long, very long years I finally got a stamp on my passport stating, with many $2 words that I can leave the country and come back here with no problem. I have wanted and waited for this for so long it doesn't even seemed important any more- it just seemed like something that was supposed to happen long time ago but was delayed indefinitely.
It makes me feel 20 lb lighter ( i wish it was true) to know that I can actually get on a plane and go to aplce that doesn't belong to the US. So many places I want to go, so many places I want to see I don't know where to start. One little bump on my way however is growing bigger and bigger in my uterus. I think he is excited for his mommy because he has been kicking like crazy this week. It is a really wonderful experience- I finally am convinced that there is someone growing inside my tummy and that we will get along really great.
It has been a really great week and I feel great- I don't think that i have ever had so much evnergy and been in such a good mood for so long. I am enjoyiing while it last. My anxiety about the last months and labor is not easing up and I don't think it ever will. My friend Karen who is expecting any minute now up in boston is feeling terrible and got a scare b/c she tought her water broke. All these stories don't make me feel any better. I tried to watch some movies about birth to educate myself thinking that that would make me more educated and calm me down. But the only outcome of watching other women give birth is me being grateful that I don't have to see what midwives and OBs see. It made me wonder why people decide to make this their carrer b/c it is disgusting.
So I figure out that there is no way around labor and now I am onl praying that it won't last too long.
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